A few days ago our son Seed called to ask if we had any garden tomatoes to share. When he arrived to get some, he told us he had gone to his own garden and was surprised to find none, not even any green ones.

That should have set off an alarm bell in my head.

Next day I noted that a portion of our pole green bean vines had been eaten off to a height that could only mean that deer had been in my garden. I walked my electric fence, found and fixed a couple of ground shorts, and hoped that would take care of that.

My garden is not exactly Fort Knox, but it does have protections. On the east is the pond. On the west and south, wire and electric fences. On the north is Gas Valley Road, the farmhouse and the barn. Deer never come through there.

Never say never.

Another day, and Honey went down to pick green beans. Not only were all the beans destroyed, but the tomatoes were gone, green ones as well as those ripening.

Eighty-four lovingly tended tomato plants, kept in production through the drought by hard work, irrigating them from the pond with a two-inch trash pump and 200 feet of hose. There were enough green ones to keep us in home-grown tomatoes for another month at least.

My Maginot defense line of fencing was worthless when the deer, like the Germans in the blitzkrieg of September 1940, attacked through the forested Ardennes, the least likely route. Col. Peggy’s little garden beside the farmhouse likewise had its tomatoes and pepper plants eaten the same night.

I should also have been warned by the fact that some weeks ago deer had eaten all, and I mean all, the pumpkins on our best field, next to Seed’s house. Between the drought and the deer, our pumpkin harvest was one-fourth of last year’s. Our first weekend for the pumpkin patch, Sept. 27-28, may be the only weekend. The grandsons, who get the pumpkin money, are learning there is as much work in a failed crop as there is in a successful one.

Look up the drought map on the internet and you’ll see Hancock County is currently rated a D2 severe drought area. The rain gauge on our porch has measured an inch and a half of rain over the past two months. We are part of a drought afflicting a regional swatch from eastern Ohio through West Virginia, Maryland, and Pennsylvania, just as drought did in 2024.

“The deer are starving,” I tell people to explain their behavior this year, but of course they aren’t starving yet. They are very hungry, and some may starve this winter. The production of mast was very low in 2024 and will be again this fall. “Mast” is the term for the nuts, acorns, berries and other natural foods that deer, bears, turkeys and other wild herbivores survive on over the winter. Look up the WV 2024 Mast Survey if you want to know more.

All this doesn’t mean you should feed them. If you feed the pretty little deer in your back yard, you are part of the problem of overpopulation, especially in residential areas. I hope they eat your shrubs, trees, and other vegetation to the ground to teach you a lesson. They will eat your neighbors’ too, so you’ll owe them an apology.

For my part, I will be very actively hunting deer on our farm this fall. I don’t care about trophy bucks. A doe eats as much as a buck. I do take the meat, though, and make a classic deer chili.

I tell people, “I don’t hunt for sport. I hunt for revenge.”

My message to the deer, delivered with a rifle, is, “You eat my stuff, I eat you.”

(Fred Miller’s books of stories are available in paperback, $10, available locally at Calcutta Giant Eagle, Pottery City Antique Mall, Museum of Ceramics, Frank’s Pastries, Davis Bros. pharmacies, and the Old Ft. Steuben gift shop.)